Satire

. Spotlights and Shadows . I. To a Limelight Leech O swankpot of the swish-and-swagger ilk Basking in your braggadocio glow, __You stoop so long and low To lap up flattery as slick as silk That spills from ovine swine of kiss-arse lip. __This eely spiel Propels your ego on...

. Supreme Showdown “Justice Jackson skips over that part because analyzing the governing statute involves boring legalese.” —Associate Justice Amy Coney Barrett in the June 27, 2025, majority opinion in Trump v. CASA. Within her new opinion, Justice Barrett deeply probedthe mind of Justice Jackson, who she totally disrobed,exposing an...

. The Point The Point, defined by geometry, substantiates a theory: position without magnitude. Lest the point be misconstrued consider how a politician, lacking substance, has position. . . Petition for Riddance of a TV Celebrity Disown her, Pheme, pity me and cleanse my screen of this red-carpet-bagging naught. Estrange...

. The Gospel of Wives Wives everywhere possess the firm belief Of all their many roles, the one that’s chief Is sparing husbands from the sheer mayhem That would befall their lives, if not for them. . . Beneath the Bad Manners Her brother, on belief that she is loaded,...

. The Inclusivity Policy of a British School ---on a 12-year-old student in Britain being barred from making a speech about being British on Culture Celebration Day Celebrate your race with jubilation. Flaunt your flag with fervent glee and grit. Revel with elation in your nation— But not if you’re...

. One Dumb Mistake When young I made a dumb mistake And was arrested by the cops. I found myself alone in court. Needless to say, my case was lost. And I was sentenced by the judge For murder: ten to twenty years. In prison I had many years To...

. Family Affair It was an educational affair, So many distant relatives were there, And it was nice to learn who they all were, Too bad without a death, this won’t occur. . . Argument Avoided There’s no need for an argument, _We do not have to fight. I’ve learned...

. Pope Leo XIV’s Green Mass My aim is red. My game is green. _I’m cloaked in clouds of white. This choking planet’s mine to clean. _I’m virtue’s guiding light. I’ll save this smoking Earth from death _With sermons---cool and calm. I’m here to ration excess breath _To keep the...

. Gorge Millennia before the Bass Pro tours, Sonar fish finders and electric reels, Some unsung pioneer dreamed baits and lures, Felt in his blood how landing lunkers feels. The knuckle dragger took a piece of bone, Slivered it down to a promising size, Fashioning gorge and braid all on...

. Gruesome Grinning Gavin smooths his tie, Makes sure he’s framed against blue sky. He pats his hair—one’s out of place; He frowns to note there’s still a trace Of imperfection in his mien, But knows the news will still refrain From bringing up those pesky fires While there’s Trump’s...

. Get Along, Little DOGE-ie Should come a day my fortunes be increased, It’s guaranteed such bounty will be fleeced. For government, like vacuum cleaners, sucks, And takes one-sixth of all my hard-earned bucks. Though spent, they say, for good things, not for ill, I doubt that what they say...

. Boomerang He was a very handsome guy, Cute girls would stick to him like glue, And his interest in them was high, But only for a night or two. Eventually he settled down, A pretty young wife came one day, And he loved having her around Those few months...

. Size Lies Clothing manufacturers are fond of tricks today, Making female customers feel good in one slick way--- Whatever size they’ve always been---they’re now two sizes smaller! So next they might try making men think they’re three inches taller. . . Bedrock Sometimes late at night when she’s sleeping,...

. If You Ever Break Down If you ever break down somewhere far from your friends _And you stick out your thumb for a ride. Don’t expect that a Beemer or Mercedes-Benz _Will slow down or pull up alongside. What you hope you will see is an open-bed truck _With...

. Big Pharma Ads Are Everywhere Big Pharma ads are everywhere __Suffusing my TV. They fail to give me confidence __that they are right for me. They start with all the maladies __their medicine is for. Then give the possibilities __of dangers I abhor. The list of all the side...

. The Wife of Bath and Winston Smith Go on a Date ---after Geoffrey Chaucer's Canterbury Tales and George Orwell's 1984 The Wife of Bath was fashionably late,while propagandist, Winston Smith---her date---sat waiting at the Chestnut Tree Café.The buxom, gap-toothed dame walked with a swayof ample hips, an amorous, long-toothed...

. My Meltdown Over the Meltdown I’ve worked since the summer when I was thirteen. Selling pink lemonade gave me plenty of green. I want to retire, but it won’t be today. I call my investments “my 201K.” Those investments are melting. I’m getting depressed. They’re melting as fast as...

. Spot the Fool! ---for April Fools’ Day, 2025 . I.  Today’s the day to fox and fool. Today’s the day to flick some fuel On laughter with a cuckoo joke, A wicked lark, a wacko poke So sick Old Nick will think it cool. Today’s the day to warp...

. Ink A lot of people nowadays adorn The spotless skin they had when they were born. While many think it’s smart to gild a lily, Dissenters deem this practice downright silly. As beauty’s in the vision of the gazer, Mistakes can be corrected with a laser. Now, when it...

. The Lilliputians Confront Elon Musk One giant has thoughts that are new and transcendent,It’s clearly a sign that he’s too independent.He claims that he’s bringing electrificationof cars, and affordable space exploration. It’s right that we fear disingenuous giantssince we can’t be certain of their full compliance.They pose a great...

. Learning Curves In classrooms smeared with monkey poop__Where questions meet deceit,She heard she came from soupy gloop---__A slab of soulless meat.Her teachers preached from thrones of bones---__They dragged brains to the brinkOf simian survival zones__That missed a vital link. Professors of the hammer tore__The wings from seraphim.They tethered lore...

. Ode to The New York Times O, soulless source of leftist propaganda Known still throughout the world as “The Gray Lady”--- You promulgate destructive memoranda From sources Soros-like---depraved and shady. O, bastion of foul racism---malicious, And full of maladroit depravity! You warp the news with communist pollution; Your social...

. Eternally Grounded There’s up and down, forward and back, Of opposites we have no lack. We have the dark and we have light, And we have left as well as right. We’ll choose to fight or run away, Keep moving on or maybe stay. Might be joyous or just...

. Kitchen-Sink Musings It’s International Women’s Day today But as a flunkee in biology I’m told I’m far from qualified to pay Fair tribute to such morphing majesty. As I’m a wombed and bosomed dinosaur With brazen XX chromosomes to boot, I’ve lost my precious Reddy right to roar--- My...

. Bloat A warrior is battling the bloat Of bulging skivers bleeding strivers dry--- The gloating glut of grubbers kept afloat By worn out workers as these shirkers shy Away from promises that snared their vote. A warrior is battling the bloat. A conqueror is scything surplus fat. The plumpest...

. Mr. Bluebird Your spirit rose before I spied your form. It dulled the winter sting and stilled the storm. Your warming warble quelled the bitter chill--- __A merry trill. I saw you perched upon a leafless limb--- A feathered chorister of crystal hymn. Your pristine chirrup sliced through ire...

. Sophisticated Stupidity Preserve the fish, defend the trees_And save the wilting daisies;Protect the coral in the seas_But kill the unborn babies.Such is the logic on displayBy science “experts” of today. Recycle and conserve the earth_For future generations,Prevent environmental dearth---_What pious aspirations!Yet underneath the verbal frills,We see extorted dollar bills....

. Margaret Brennan’s Plan to Stop Genocide “Well, he was standing in a country where free speech was weaponized to conduct a genocide" ---Margaret Brennan, February 16, 2025 on “Face the Nation” Miss Margaret Brennan just proved she is wise, and her brilliance has finally opened our eyes. She has...

. Aged Elation When reaching that age where you fear getting slow, The advent of faculties starting to go, It’s great inspiration---you can’t ask for more--- To figure out something you couldn’t before. . . Adaptation We aren’t blessed with complete compatibility. At times I’m not so sweet; you more...

. Dog Eat Dog As cells get divided, if outcomes are guided _completely by rolling the dice, the fit must survive so their genes stay alive, _while the weak pay the ultimate price. So students of Darwin, say people who are win- _ners of this genetic roulette must all procreate...

. A Bogus Bishop’s Prayer My prayer is not pitched heavenward _To fall upon deaf ears. It’s lashed to Earth for greater good. _It cashes in on tears. It's feathered several nests for years--- _I'm Croesus-rich and famed. I’m feasting at the public trough _And I am not ashamed. My...

USAID USAID Mission Statement: On behalf of the American people, we promote and demonstrate democratic values abroad, and advance a free, peaceful, and prosperous world. We are funding a world that’s more peaceful and free through the taxpayer funded USAID, but its nature is hidden behind a facade that disguises...

. The Judge Addresses the Defendant "Living in America is like serving in the army; ninety percent of conduct is prescribed by law and the remaining ten percent by the esprit de corps." —Albert Jay Nock Of course you have free speech. I wouldn’t sit Here on the Federal bench...

. The Untimely Demise of My Dear Uncle Sam I received the somber news __as sun set low today. My beloved Uncle Sam __by death was swept away. It wasn’t on the battlefield that __he met his demise. ‘Twas long before when men ignored __the counsel of the wise. Through...

. The Discharge of the Woke Brigade ---after Tennyson Half a mil, half a mil, __Half a mil onward, __All from the Treasury ____Filched the encumbered. __‘Forward, the Woke Brigade, __Mooch till the end!’ Prof said. __Into the jaws of debt ____Dove the encumbered. __‘Forward, the Woke Brigade!’ __Was there...

. Wisdom and Sway Life was tranquil and calm, not a care, not a qualm, in a town not too near you, but not far away. It was led by a mayor, a powerful player, a grandiose mayor with wisdom and sway. We’d always considered the sky to be blue....

. Pearls or Swine? Pray show me how to tell a pearl from swine. I have a thirst for sanity to slake. I seek a clue---a firm not fluid sign To steer me from the sway of all that’s fake. While Einsteins whine and eggheads bellyache, As boundaries blur and...

. Four Newsy Limericks . A pedophile, if you should see one, Must not be reported. The reason? __It could be your fate __That you’d be charged with “hate.” A crime worse by far than to be one. . It’s easier dealing with China, Than rebuilding in South Carolina __When...

. O Delta Smelt O Delta Smelt of silver scale, O threatened gem of fin and tail, In brackish waters made just so By crimson hands as ill winds blow, Your saviors sing of Toad and Whale. As fires rage and hydrants fail, As houses blaze and hopes grow pale,...

. Payday Before the crash, the market looked so strong. I doled out cash and credit, buying in While others sold. But, sadly, I was wrong About this, confidence my greatest sin, And I have duly suffered, if my bank Account means anything. For such mistakes I have myself and...