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Home Poetry

‘A Damsel in Distress’ and Other Valentine’s Day Poetry by Damian Robin

February 13, 2021
in Poetry
A A
8

.

A Damsel in Distress

A hot, courting Knight
in blithering armour
Vowed on his horse 
he would never-ever harm her
Then he revved up his stallion 
and bamboozled off hard,
Heavy metaled to the damsel 
across the court yard,
But the speed of his steed 
succeeded to alarm her
So she breathed a fast prayer
to intercede for her karma.

And what is the end 
of this horsey tale drama?
Her poor courtly servants 
were forced to embalm her.

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M O R A L
A beau on a charger protected for war
Must hang battle badges on Tender Love’s door
Or hearts will lie havoced and all end up sore.

.

.

I Love You More Than Indoor Dinner Dating

I love you more than I can say,
__than indoor dinner dating,
Than cosy garden-plucked bouquet
__or food that’s warm and sating:

Than microwaving chicken wings,
__than drumsticks baked and seasoned,
Than pan-fried bacon as it sings,
__or substitutes well-reasoned.

Much more than veg or vegan pie
__or imitation suet,
or sugar work that seems to fly
__or rock that spells ‘good’ through it.

Much more than having just deserts
__that send the belly beating,
Skin stretched so taut that breathing hurts
__from beastly over-eating.

Much more than base, survival stakes
__or full, complete nutrition—
One bite of you is all it takes
__to bring love to fruition. 

.

.

Damian Robin is a writer and editor living in the United Kingdom.

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Comments 8

  1. Cynthia Erlandson says:
    5 years ago

    Hilariously romantic, Damian!

    Reply
    • Damian Robin says:
      5 years ago

      Thanks so much Cynthia. Hope the stability beneath the hilarity and romantic commonality . . . shone through.

      Reply
  2. C.B. Anderson says:
    5 years ago

    You always take risks, Damian, not least of which here is “imitation suet.” In the USA suet is something only winter birds eat, and what the imitation of it might be is something I can scarcely imagine, unless it’s soy-based suet. I have no beef with you, because in your own inimitable way, you always cut to the marrow.

    Reply
    • Damian Robin says:
      5 years ago

      Me? Take risks? With a set of tongs and flame-proof gloves.
      Though sometimes with temerity when fed up with add-verse-ity.

      Your
      Notify me of follow-up comments by email.
      and
      Notify me of new posts by email.
      may still not work, CBA, so I may send this via email.

      Meanwhile,

      https://www.nigella.com/ask/substitute-for-suet

      Reply
  3. Susan Jarvis Bryant says:
    5 years ago

    Damian, this a rare departure from your latest hard-hitting political pieces and I love it, especially “I Love You More Than Indoor Dinner Dating” – the closing couplet is an unexpected wonder. Bravo!

    Reply
    • Damian Robin says:
      5 years ago

      Thanks, Susan. Trying to have balance (like you with many talents).

      To be a rounded person,
      A balloon to take to the sky,
      One has to have many a version
      Many a finger in many a pie.

      Thanks for your support, please take a piece of this virtual pie.

      Reply
  4. David Watt says:
    5 years ago

    Damian, I particularly enjoyed “I Love You More Than Indoor Dinner Dating” because each succeeding stanza contains an inventive surprise or two, leading me to wonder what will follow.

    Reply
    • Damian Robin says:
      5 years ago

      What will follow, David, my friend,
      (though I’ll not wallow)
      is always the end.

      What happens between now and then
      Is where the excitements happen.

      Thanks, DW, for your uplifting words.

      Reply

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