.
The candlelight was dim and spare
And Claire was there, lost in prayer
And slightly swaying to and fro
(She dances for Him, this I know)
And I do swear that she did glow—
Whence comes this light? He does bestow.
.
.
Joe Tessitore is a retired New York City resident and poet.
I love the poem. I only would take the And out. It would flow like the light you are speaking about. That is only a suggestion. I still care for the poem just the way you wrote it.
It’s lovely Joe! an’ya
Joe~ breathtaking in its beauty, wrapped in utter
beauty and grand simplicity. Thank you.
Joe, this is beautiful in its brevity. There have been precious moments in my life illuminated by the very “glow” you mention.
Thank you all very much.
Nice, Joe. My own daughter was once engaged with ballet. Now she’s a mother, and the dance she dances is much more complicated than it was before, but still she is attentive to the Lord’s grace. I am humbled in her presence, and I am struck to the core by your brief poem.
It sounds like your daughter and Claire were cut from the same cloth.
Thank you for your very touching comment.
Such a sweet, simple poem and yet a jewel — especially the last line.
I’ve been a fan of the short poem ever since reading Wordsworth’s ‘A Slumber did my Spirit Seal’.
I really liked this poem, Joe.
I’d agree that removing ‘And’ before ‘slightly’. It made the poem flow better for me.
The placement of the question mark halfway through the last line (followed by an answer) rather than at the end, is quite masterful and thought-provoking.
Thanks for the read.